Ghost (Writing) Clinic

A friend of mine told me several months ago that she will join a writing workshop by the end of May. I simply asked her how to join the workshop. Everything with ghost in writing interest me 🙂 . . . though I am not a writer.I can only write daily stories, a kind of diary, and just short stories. Start from rarely to write in 2015 to update my private blow until I don’t write anymore. I just feel that I can’t write and my writings just an ordinary ones, not good and not interesting. That is the reason I like to write as a ghost by using pseudonym. Mostly readers don’t know that it was my writing. But several of my close friends can guess it by reading the writing style I use. Even now, it is a struggle for me to write the opening sentence. When reading my old writings, I don’t remember how can I write all the sentences. Some of my friends said that I need to practice and start to write article for blog. Don’t they know my struggle that I don’t feel confidence with my own writings? Or is it because I’m too afraid to get some critics? Or afraid that reader will say that it is a bad writing ever? Or I don’t want to practice or to try again? Or still I can’t let go my old wounds which hurt my heart deeply?

No matter the reasons are, I just know that I’m lazy to write and provide so many excuses not to write anymore. So when joining the ghost writer clinic, I meet the great speaker. She is an editor who becomes a fiction writer, a wellknown ones. Again she reminds us about practice, practice, and practice to increase the writing skill. That’s the difficult task for me since I never write anymore. But she bewitches me with the writing process of Negeri Para Roh. She gives several practice ways how to sharpen our writing skills. It seems that she says, “Don’t be afraid to write! You write to satisfy your soul and heart, no matter others will say!” Can I do that?

That’s the reason which make me shock since I’m one of two participants who won the main doorprize: this great writer, Rosi L. Simamora, will coaching me personally to write something, until the end of December 2016! All the participants want this doorprize and I’m the one who get it, but still I don’t believe it . . . what will I write? This is a great opportunity, but I don’t know how to use it . . . these questions come up in my mind when the MC invites me to go to the front and shake hand with mbak Rosi. It is not a dream, but still I can’t believe it. Even mbak Rosi can read it through my face . . .

Yes, it will be my good chance to write again. But the big question is, what will I write? Don’t know yet . . .

 

My room, 29 May 2016

 

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merayap

Puluhan kendaraan mengular memenuhi dua ruas jalan menuju Semanan. Dari arah berlawanan, kendaraan-kendaraan yang muncul menahan guliran rodanya saat angkot yang kutumpangi meliak-liuk mencari jalan. Lalu terdengar sapaan bersamaan gemerincing recehan yang berpindah tangan dari pengemudi ke telapak penjaga rel kereta . . . memuluskan jalannya angkot untuk melintas pertama. Saat mendekati simpang Semanan, pejalan kaki pun menang telak melawan angkot sang raja jalanan. Ada terselip bangga karena tak satu pun keluh terucap dari mulut pengemudinya. Namun peluh tak bisa kubendung. Hawa panas makin meraja lela dan klakson pun unjuk suara. Hebatnya mulut pengemudi tetap terkunci, tapi jemarinya lincah memainkan bunyi, mengusik telinga. Bunyi mereda saat simpang berhasil ditembus dan angkot itu melaju mengantarku.

Semanan, 28 Mei 2016—#latihan 1
gaya tulisan lebay dot com 🙂 (#dibuangsayang)

Negeri Para Roh

negeri-para-roh-cover

Publisher: Gramedia Pustaka Utama
Publish Date: Nov 30, 2015

Novel ini merupakan kisah fiksi yang ditulis dengan apik berdasarkan kisah nyata 6 Juni 2006 yang dialami 5 insan saat longboat yang mereka tumpangi dijungkirbalikkan dahsyatnya ombak di tengah lautan Arafuru.

Dua kubu berkecamuk di medan benak . . . antara perasaan enggan dan perasaan sayang . . . selesai membaca buku karya Rosi L. Simamora. Namun perasaan sayang jika tak menuliskan apa yang kutemukan menjadi pemenang telak saat menuliskan tiap kata ini.

* Seperti naik roller-coster
Saat jiwa terkesiap manakala longboat dijungkirbalikkan di tengah lautan yang mengganas, tiba-tiba bab selanjutnya menenangkan jiwa dengan kilas balik cerita. Sesaat setelah tertawa mendengar keusilan Senna yang menggoda Sambudi dan obrolan Bagus dengan Hara, jiwa pembaca kembali dibawa membubung dengan hentakan gelora badai lautan . . . mencekam saat membaca perjuangan mereka. Lalu dibawa turun lagi dengan mengulas latar belakang cerita . . . lalu kembali lagi ke peristiwa celaka . . . sungguh piawai penulisnya menghentak jiwa pembaca bukunya.

* Sulitnya lepas dari masa lalu
Terkadang pahitnya luka karena cinta membuat seseorang memuntahkan sakitnya pada orang lain yang tak tahu kelamnya masa lalu dan siapakah lakon dalam buku ini yang sangat pas menggambarkannya? Pertemuannya dengan Hara memicunya untuk menguarkan ketidaksukaannya meski sebenarnya ia tak bermaksud melakukannya. Namun apa daya, semburan mulut yang tak bisa dikendalikannya sempat menggoreskan luka. Uniknya saat membaca celetukan Senna yang menggodanya, mulutku terbahak tertawa. Ingin tahu candanya?

* Berkutat dengan rasa kehilangan
Kental sekali gambaran tentang perjuangan batin Senna untuk bisa melepas kepergian sahabatnya, Bagus. Sampai halaman terakhir selesai dibaca, aku pun merasa tak terima dan terus bertanya apa yang terjadi pada Bagus. Secara nalar, ia berpeluang paling besar untuk selamat dari amukan badai Arafuru karena bisa berpegang di longboat dan ditemani Lucky dan Agus, tukang perahu yang paling piawai menguasai medan yang menggelora. Jadi bisa kebayang pergumulan Senna yang terus mempertanyakan di mana letak salahnya, ke mana perginya Bagus, susahnya untuk menerima kepergian Bagus untuk selamanya…karena tak ada bukti jasadnya. Apa yang dilakukan Senna untuk bisa melepas kepergian sahabatnya?

* Belajar memahami arti cukup dan dicukupkan
Drybox, gosong pasir, hujan, siput, kepiting, botol aqua yang masih ada setengah isinya, pulau tak bertuan yang tak terengkuh pasang . . . hal-hal sederhana yang dipakai sang Pencipta untuk mencukupkan kebutuhan empat jiwa yang berjuang melawan amukan gelombang di tengah laut Arafuru. . . . bagaimana bisa?

* Berkutat dengan rasa tak percaya diri
Tipikal gadis berada yang dimanja dan selalu dilindungi keluarga termasuk memilihkan segala sesuatu dalam hidupnya . . . tiba-tiba Hara memutuskan untuk mencoba sebagai presenter program Petualang dan entah bagaimana nasib bisa memilihnya untuk melanglang ke negeri para roh. Apakah petualangan itu bisa membentuk nyalinya?

* Kala iman dan keyakinan mistis beradu
Siapa yang mau bergulingan di lumpur ? Itulah budaya Asmat supaya roh orang yang meninggal tak mengusik raga, orang-orang yang hidup pun bergulingan di lumpur agar tak terendus baunya oleh roh si orang mati. Tetua meminta Bagus berguling di lumpur juga . . . tetapi ia menolak karena lebih memilih untuk berpihak pada imannya . . . itukah penyebab tak panjang usianya? Enam-enam-enam . . . 6 Juni 2006 . . . apakah karena kombinasi angka itu peristiwa nahas tersebut terjadi?

* Menggeluti segala kisah dunia roh
Menggeluti budaya Asmat dan tradisi pengayauan yang pernah mereka lakukan mewujud dalam kisah-kisah memikat sang pencerita dan juga Totopras. Saat mulut membeku melihat keteguhan Bagus meski pengalaman yang sama pernah dirasakan Topras sesaat sebelum kakak tersayangnya meregang nyawa. Dapatkah segala legenda tua dipercaya?

* Sekilas mengintip budaya dan tradisi suku Asmat
Saat membaca buku ini, pikiran diajak mengembara untuk mengenal sekilas suku di pedalaman Papua . . . budaya, tradisi, rumah, tanah, roh, keyakinan, pepohonan, . . . menambah kekayaan benak melalui dongeng yang dituturkan si pencerita tua.

* Saling menyemangati dan memberi perhatian
Saat ketakutan mencengkeram hati hati, ada Bagus dan Totopras yang memberikan suntikan semangat lewat obrolan, diskusi, dan cerita. Saat Sambudi menyerah kalah karena malaria, tangan Hara terus merawat orang yang membuat hatinya terluka. Saat Sambudi memeluk erat kamera di tengah gulungan ombak laut, saat Sambudi enggan berpisah dengan sepatu kesayangannya meski badan sangatlah penat setelah diombang-ambingkan badai . . . ada Bagus, Senna, dan Hara yang dengan lembut menghardiknya. Berhasilkah?

* Guilty feeling
Andai aku tak memaksa pulang hari ini . . . andai aku sabar menantikan jadwal penerbangan berikutnya . . . andai aku mendengar peringatan si pencerita renta . . . andai Bagus tak terpisah dari kami berempat . . . segala andai yang membuat hati merana . . .

* Kepiawaian menggali cerita
Tidak sekadar menulis . . . riset, kunjungan, wawancara dengan orang yang bersinggungan dengan peristiwa 6-6-2006, buku-buku bacaan yang dilahap, akses di dunia maya, bertemu pada tetua adat . . . demi memadukan kisah nyata yang membuat terpana, disisipi pernak-pernik budaya Asmat yang keramat dengan untaian kata-kata memikat jiwa . . . sungguh penulis yang luar biasa.

* Bacalah bukunya dan temukan sendiri harta Anda 🙂

Jakarta, 24 Mei 2016

trip to Depok :)

I dont believe that I actually did the trip last nite or this early morning. Today is Sem’s birthday and she starts to live in her house at Depok with her brother. I miss her since we are together to live in the same boarding house for almost 10 years 😦

Today is her birthday and actually her sister and I have a plan to go to Depok on next Friday to celebrate the birthday. Her sister has 4 subjects to learn at her campus today and I as usual has to go to the office, then do the teaching. Too late to go to Depok after we are done with our activities.

So yesterday morning, I came up with an idea that we have to make a surprise for Sem at midnite. I tried to find a car to rent, but all are full-booking. Thanks God, Edel and Andri can find one and succeed to ask Ray, their friend, to be the driver.

I arrived home at 20.30 after visited Marlina at RS Siloam, Karawaci. Then at 21.30, we were ready to go to Depok…Edel, Ray, Inda, Sri, Andri, Roland, and me. Inda bought the birthday cake for this simple surprise party. At 23.13, we arrived at GDC. Since the kids were hungry, we stopped at nasi uduk for late dinner.

Then we arrived at Sem’s house at 24.05 🙂 …so much fun for the preparation, so many laughs with the kids, and Inda’s effort to open the gate quietly. It succeed but not with the main door at the house. We found out that Sem did not pull out the key from the door so that we can’t open it from outside. Thanks God since Bobby was awake and opened the door for us.

And Sem…she just woke up from her sleep 🙂 but she told us that she had the feeling that we will do something for her because of my WhatsApp messages. Oh, no…we try to keep it secret, but I’m the one who blow the secret. Yesterday morning I just said how I miss her and how is her first journey from Depok to her office. But because of the messages, she had got the feeling that something will happen for her….so sorry kids 🙂

At least we had so much fun in the short time. But something happened with my tummy. I had got a stomachache and it hurt very much. I thought that it was because of the nasi uduk, but only me who got the stomachache 😦 It disappeared after I spent some times in the toilet. Then we were ready to go home.

Ray was so fast when we were heading home…whether it was late at nite so the street was very quiet or because he was sleepy as we were. We can sleep during the journey but Ray cant 🙂

At 2.30, I reached my room sweet room and fall a sleep rightaway…thanks kids for today 🙂

Jakarta & Depok, 11 June 2015

a hidden gift

It’s almost a year after my last post 😦 How difficult to discipline myself to write something. So today will start again…hope that it will not only a seasonal wish, but will be a routine thing to do…at least one writing a month make my fingers dance smoothly 🙂

This morning is different from my usual mornings. Since yesterday I didn’t keep up my words with David for the broadcasting stuff, I “pay” my debt today. Now I am dealing with Jo. He asks me to read a devotional after gives me two tips: 1. try to be relax, 2. pay attention to your articulation and intonation. That’s all and he just standing next to me when my voice being recorded.

Then he gives his evaluation. My voice color is “ripe” enough for the low voice (the alto sound). My articulation is clear and the thing that makes me shock is when he said that I have a good voice color for radio. He and David have a “sensitive” hearing to know which sound is good or not for the “voice”. “He says, “Your voice is a gift.” Though he can hear the javanese dialect in my voice. The dialect can’t be erased, but it can be reduce since it is the way I speak since I was born.

Frankly speaking, I never think that my voice is my gift. I just feel that this morning, he and He reveal my hidden gift. But is it true? For me it’s too good to be true. I’m too too quiet, even I seldom to speak if it’s not necessary. In my family, I have my father’s DNA, of course lah 🙂 … what I mean is that I am almost the same as my daddy…quiet and can’t sing. Though my dad is a good teacher but don’t ask him to sing 🙂 even he only talks much in front of the class, out of the class, the silent mode on. And myself is the same. So when Jo said that my voice color is good, actually I can’t believe it. When I told him about it, he said that I’ve never been diagnosed by the right doctor who knows well about voice stuff.

He also explains that when someone is hearing their recording voice, they have 2 feelings: 1. they have no confidence of themselves (subjective), 2. there is a difference when hearing the voice directly or the recording voice. When I am speaking, I hear the sound through the air and also I can feel the sound which propagates from my mouth to my ear. When hearing the recording voice, I only hear the sound through the air. It creates the differences of the sound.

But still I am not sure with my own voice. David and Jo agree that I have a good voice color, I am not convinced yet. They have an open audition for the staff to read the devotional for radio program. I’m not sure that I will be the chosen voice since Santi’s, Echa’s, Mary’s, Yuli’s, Riris’ are much much better 🙂 At least I have tried to record my voice.

Is it difficult to give thanks for my hidden gift? Yes, it is since I never realize that I have it. On the other side, I am afraid if I never use this special gift of mine…the hidden one…

Jakarta, 17 September 2014

happy thanksgiving :)

suddenly i remember the thanksgiving party in my old office. since no turkey in Indonesia, chicken is ok lah 🙂 So the boss ‘cooked’ 2 or 3 grilled chickens with special ingredients in her big oven and prepared also smash potatoes and others. Then the lunch was ready to serve.

At my time, the staff only a few, not more than 15, so it was a must to say what we were give thanks for…in our work, our family, or our personal life. Hearing all their thanks made me amazed…and now still amazed…of how great our Lord is.

Not only we gave thanks for big things or miraculous ones, even the smallest things or the ordinary ones that made us really grateful for Him…when we still have opportunity to open our eyes in the morning…hey, i’m still alive today 🙂 …, to inhale the fresh air, to move all parts of our body, to smile with our lips, for the sun, for the family, for the work, for all things…

After all the giving thanks and praying for all things He has done and given, we were ready to eat now. The boss’ husband were ready with his knife and big fork to cut the chickens. “Which part do you want?” he asked us one by one…head, neck, breast, wings, etc. He cut the chicken for each of us…and then we started to enjoy the meals and also the togetherness again and again.

So, happy Thanksgiving 🙂
What would you give thanks for today and tomorrow and so-on and so-on? 🙂

Jakarta, 28 November 2013

langit suam-suam kuku

pagi ini, tak terlihat mendung
tak ada juga pijaran mentari
akankah hujan hari ini?
ataukah cerah sepanjang hari?

langit suam-suam kuku
membuatku cemas tak menentu
tak jelas apa yang menanti
saat tiba di penghujung hari

itukah alasan tak disukai
suam-suam kukunya hati
tak panas, tak juga dingin
tak menunjukkan kepastian hati

langit suam-suam kuku
memberikan gambaran pasti
kulit luar terlihat teduh
tak bisa ditebak hasil yang menanti

janganlah suam-suam kuku hatiku
pilihlah satu yang pasti
jangan seperti langit suam-suam kuku
yang terbentang di pagi ini

goresan hati
Jakarta, 28 Nov 2013